December 18, 2006

• hi umma.
  it's me.
  did you get my email?
  yeah.
  i did.
  thanks.
  oh yeah
  i'm staying in japan another year...
  at least.
  don't worry.
  grad school will still be there.
  this experience will help me with my job in the future.
  yes it will.
  yes it will.
  i've talked to my professors and bosses about it.
  they say this experience will be good for me.
  and besides, career isn't that important to me.
  i don't care about money.
  i care about the experience.
  well...who says i want to get married anyway...
  and now?
  i'm not even ready.
  i can get married later if i want to.
  i am not that old.
  you'll just have to stay alive.
  well...stop smoking then.
  there will be men left.
  stop worrying.
  yeah, sell my car.
  i'll get another one when i return
  (if i return).
  huh? what?
  no, i didn't say anything.
  i've been thinking....
  wouldn't it be nice to move to another country
  after japan?
  uh....no.
  nevermind
  i didn't say anything.
  don't worry.
  yes. i'm eating ok
  yes. i'm cooking.
  japanese food, korean food, "american food"
  everything.
  i even learned how to cook australian food.
  stop worrying..
  besides, i can cook.  you know i can.
  huh?
  oh yeah.
  yeah..... thanks.
  i got your cards.  thanks.
  yeah. i celebrated it with some friends
  and there wasn't any space anywhere for our group
  it was too big and my city was really busy.
  no. i didn't have birthday cake...but i don't need it.
  besides, my birthday isn't until a few days anyway.
  i'm fat. you said so.  remember?
  sigh.  i know.  i'll lose weight.
  i know i know.
  i'll go to church.
  i know i know.
  sigh.
  what?
  i didn't sigh. i was just breathing.
  what?  i can't just breathe?
  ok whatever.
  yes, of course i miss you.
  i know i'm your only child.
  i know.  i know.
  but can't i just have my life?
  you have roberto too.
  he is your adventure.
  i need my adventure....
  but i don't think my adventure is a husband.
  i don't think you understand mom.
  i can't explain it in korean.
  ai...cham.
  yes, i'm learning japanese.
  yes, i'm learning the customs.
  my japanese is really good now.
  i'm learning korean too.
  
  well, i go to work, come back,
  work on some writing,
  on a chapbook
  um...it's like a book of writing/poetry and art.
  i'm going to exhibit it in an art show next year.
  i know i know....
  but i can work on grad school stuff later
  i don't even know what i want to study.
  but i know what i want to do now.
  well, i don't know if i'm a good writer
  but i'm working on it.
  i know it won't pay a lot.
  but i like it.
  oh yeah...and i'm gonna go back to playing the piano.
  i'm going to try at least
  there's a piano at my school.
  yes, exercize too.
  i'm going to get back into playing volleyball.
  huh?
  no no...with the school's team.
  it's just to help out.
  i know....lose weight.
  i know. i know.
  ...
  yes, mommy....i miss you too.
  yes, i DO love you.
  you just frustrate me.
  i know.
  you're my cactus.
  it means ...
  well, you know how people give flowers
  to people they love?
  they are beautiful and pleasant
  but they die quickly.
  you and i have a cactus love, mom.
  it's prickly and rough
  but it lasts practically forever.
  i know.
  i know you love me.
  i love you too.
  ok.
  bye.
  i'll talk to you later.
  bye.

  click.

  • 8:37 am
  • 6 Comments